 |
|
| |
|
PUBLICATION
| Title: | The Art of Listening and the Power of Coaching |
| Source: | Chicago Hospital News |
| Publish Date: | 05/01/2005 |
| Author: | Deborah Taber |
Many years ago, I sat at my grandmother’s kitchen table as my aunts and uncles told stories of their childhood experiences. As the evening wore on, the discussions shifted to what each of them missed most about those early years. They quickly began to make lists of the childhood mementos and objects that were long since thrown away and regaled about how much those objects meant to them. Then, they jokingly turned to my grandmother and accused her of getting rid of these sacred objects without asking their permission.
My grandmother, who had grown very quiet listening to this discussion, paused, turned to my uncle and said, "Robert, how would you be different today if you still had that trophy?" Uncle Bob stopped to think and then said, "I guess I wouldn’t be any different." Watching him carefully, my grandmother responded, "You still have the memory of what it took to win that old race. Isn’t that what’s really important about you today?" I watched as a slow smile began to spread across my uncle’s face. He looked up and said, "Yes, I guess that is what’s really important!"
I think that was my first experience with the power of coaching.
Sometimes, being in a management position in the healthcare field is a very lonely place to be. We work so hard and so fast that we have very little time to reflect on what is really important about our work. The road to hell is often paved with hasty, good intentions. Successful managers know that thinking and reflecting are the places where intelligent action begins. But too often, we take the short cut of ‘fixing the problem’ without understanding its root cause. Given the frenetic pace of our daily lives, and the pressure-cooker environment in which we make decisions in our jobs, it is easy to get stuck or derailed and loose momentum.
That’s where a coach can make a big difference! Great coaches ask powerful, open-ended questions that spur thinking and reflection. And, they listen to the words and the tones of the message expressed. They also listen to the message that is left unsaid – the issue too close to the heart to be made public unless it is a very safe place. Coaches take them to that safe place.
Coaches rarely give advice. Instead, the coach assumes that their clients are creative, knowledgeable about their area of expertise and resourceful enough to work through their own problems. The role of the coach is to listen carefully and ask powerful questions that help them uncover, explore and stay focused on the core, compelling issues until the manager breaks through their old way of thinking and finds their own solution. Often, the right solution resonates through them like the final chords of an old church hymn. Once potential solutions or connections are identified, the coach holds the manager accountable for the actions they choose to take. Coaching is about listening without expressing opinions or judgments and then holding up the standard to encourage accomplishment of difficult personal goals.
I now know that each person’s journey does not have a single destination. In fact, there is an initial goal, and then another, and then another. Having a coach - or a grandmother - with the wisdom to listen is a very valuable gift. When they have the ability ask powerful questions and help us understand and commit to what is important in our work and our personal lives, it can make all the difference!
|
(630) 571-3311 Oak Brook, IL |
(312) 541-0294 Chicago, IL |
(732) 585-7575 Iselin, NJ |
(949) 551-4377 Irvine, CA |
(770) 891-7866 Atlanta, GA |
(800) 358-1112 Corporate Office |
